"Hold on a minute, I've got a great idea. Hello, I'm Michael Deeley, the producer of then original Italian Job and I'll tell you what was supposed to happen next.
"You remember that after a successful raid, William (the driver) got a little carried away driving the coach to fame and glory over the alps. The lads were celebrating in the back.There was drinking. Dancing. Suddenly, around one hairpin bend, William lost it. The back end of the coach span out quicker than a bird on a barcrawl, and came to a halt with half of it on the road, and half of it staring down the valley of death. The gold was in the back end. Obviously. And the film ends with Caine's immortal words: 'Hold on lads, I got a great idea. Er. Er.'
"Well I'd written the sequel, so what happens next is thus: We hear some machine noise, and two helicopters fly over the nearest range with a long cord between them. It's hooked underneath the coach, is lifted up, and the gold comes tumbling out. It's the mafia you see. And the sequel is all about getting the gold back from them. Good, don't you think?"*
Well no, actually Michael, I don't. The greatest dilemma in cinematic history ruined. And so is my life.
Ok I'm over it.
Still can't believe you told us.
It appears I'm not over it.
*script taken from desert island discs Fri 19th December. there may be a few inaccuracies.